Built For Life
Words of Wisdom for Good Men…
What are the makings of a good man? There are many different recipes and a wide range of potential ingredients, with some standard, go-to seasonings always included.
Some would say a good man is a protector. A person who shows up and never leaves. A provider. He has integrity and self-control. He’s someone who is strong, yet kind. He is well-intentioned and knows how to love. He’s smart, with a work ethic as solid as his sense of determination. Someone who respects himself and others—those he knows, and those he doesn’t. He isn’t perfect, but it doesn’t stop him from trying to be the best version of himself. He’s patient and has a sense of humor. A good man is slow to anger, knows how to manage his emotions, and can help calm those around him. He has ambition, vision and the will to see it through. The list could go on.
What’s harder to discern is how these qualities came to develop in the good men around us. Some men have heard words of wisdom directly—from the men who came before them, from family members, coaches, mentors and perfect strangers they happened upon along life’s road. Some have seen the lived example of the good men they know in a way they can’t help but emulate. Other good men have had to learn through the school of the hard knocks—through the daily hustle and bustle of manhood—where the answers were not always as clearly delineated.
A good word can teach us how to love, inspire us to move through the world safely, help us navigate relationships, protect our bodies and support our financial health. A good word creates peace of mind. Here is some sage advice, passed down to some good men by family members, friends and life itself. May these honest, wise, sometimes practical, sometimes funny tidbits inspire you to recall some of the wisdom you’ve gained along the way and pass it along. Another good man may just need to hear what you have to say.
“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” — Theodore Roosevelt
‘Make your dollars have more sense’ was something my grandpa, Lionel Woods said to me. When I asked him if he was saying sense or cents, he said ‘yes, as one will lead to the other.’ My grandfather said this to me as a kid when I was about to spend my allowance on something completely unnecessary. At the time I thought it was funny, but it stuck with me through life and has turned out to be an amazing life lesson. And my Uncle Henry told me on my wedding day, ‘Don’t bring a TV set into your bedroom.’ When I asked why he said, ‘That’s time for you and your wife. You see how many kids I have, right?’ True story. I will never forget it and there is a ton of truth in it. – Derek D.
“First impressions and your word are the foundation of your character. My Poppa shared this with me when I was 16. I still live by it.”- James C.
“‘Never tell the truth when you’re kidding. It’s the worst thing you can do.’ My grandfather gave this piece of advice to my dad, and he passed it on to me.” – Jason W.
“The best advice I ever received came from my late father-in-law, Ken Green: ‘Always be true to your word, give everything that you do 100 percent, and always try to lead by example.’ Another thing he taught me is that there is nothing more sacred than family. I live by those things in my teaching and in my everyday life, and to this day, I do my very best to live up to the example he set for me and the rest of our family. He had more integrity and backbone than any man I ever met, as well as a truly incredible work ethic and leadership skills. He always had your back no matter what, and that usually came with a little life lesson. He was the best father-in-law in the world. I admired him and I do my best to be as he was.” – Marvin A.
“My Italian grandmother would always tell me, ‘Mia moglie ha sempre ragione,’ meaning ‘my wife is always right.’ I have a trivet by the stove that reads that, so I’m reminded every day.” – Steve D.
“Don’t get your honey where you get your money. My grandfather gave me that advice and I still don’t date people I work with.” – Darryl T.
“Love your neighbor as yourself. Jesus taught me that.” -Raymond B.
“It wasn’t so much what I was told, but what I was shown: my father’s actions. He lived a life doing the things he wanted to do, regardless of what was ‘expected’ of a man of color. ‘Make your money, and live as you wish. Don’t expect a lot when I’m gone, because I am giving you all I have right now.’ That always stayed with me. He also said, ‘Don’t expect anyone to give you anything for nothing.’ His example got me this far.” – Ray T.
“I wasn’t much of a listener in my life, but here’s something I learned along the way: the struggle is real. Believe in yourself and find stability in your own inner core.” – Todd H.
“The one thing my dad ingrained in me was, ‘Do it right or not at all.’ There are two types of mindsets in people: The first is ‘any action is better than no action’ and the second is ‘the only action is the right action.’ I’m aligned with the second one. Some may refer to it as ‘paralysis by analysis’ but I don’t see it that way. I don’t want to do something arbitrarily and then have to redo it because it wasn’t right. I want to analyze, research, create a game plan, have all my tools and materials ready and then attack the task once I’m prepared. In retrospect that was my dad, as well.” – Dominic D.
“‘Second place is the first loser.’ Now, not everyone these days is a fan of tough love, but words like this challenge a person to have a growth mindset. I have come a long way and constantly challenge myself to be my best. My dad shared this with me, and we both still say it to this day.” – Aaron L.
“I wasn’t much of a listener in my life, but here’s something I learned along the way: the struggle is real. Believe in yourself and find stability in your own inner core.” – Todd H.
“Try not to become a man of success, but rather a man of value.” — Albert Einstein
